Petrified Fungus

Dr, Gary, Davis, Fungus, Petrified, Relationships, People

 by Nicolas Rück 

Def.— Fungus:  any one of a group of related plants (such as molds, mushrooms, or yeasts) that have no flowers and that live on dead or decaying things.

 http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/fungus

            The above definition of fungus is also analogous to any number of governmental agencies, business corporations, churches, marriages, & interpersonal relationships. Think pork-barrel spending, executive bonuses, Medieval Christian expressions still prevalent, friendships that have long since lost their significance, or loveless adversarial marriages.

We have too many relationships in our lives that have lost their core, their reason to exist. They become like fungus, once attached to a living, thriving entity, now dead. Even worse, those connections have become solidified — devoid of even symbiotic attachment. We become simply a carcass of petrified fungus.

It is an observable fact that many organizations and individuals grow stagnant in the way they function. The zest that once typified them has slipped into the doldrums of despondency. Relationships take effort. If there seems to be no umph! in your marriage or church or company maybe it is because you have lost your vision, or your sense of expecting God to work. Maybe your relationship, be it spousal or friendship, has plummeted the depths of boredom because you just haven’t put anything into it lately…, or, for a long time. Your life & friendships are dying from a lack of oxygen.

Being the first one to make the effort to bring fresh air back into a mission, or marriage, is always a daunting effort. If God has designed you to be the one who must initiate the first steps toward reconciliation, or restoration, or forgiveness, then get used to it. It’s what you were made for. Think of it as your curse, or your privilege; doesn’t matter. JUST GET ON AND DO IT.

Sure, you get tired of being the one who must initiate every innovation or repair of a relationship. You wish to God that someone else would beat you to it. Again, it doesn’t matter. SIMPLY DO IT. Do not let unresolved issues run-on unresolved. The deepest pain I live with are people who do not want resolution in relationships. But there have been points where all my efforts became futile. It is only after years of trying that I give up, realizing that true resolution must be a two way street.

If you do not come to a resolution you will find yourself in a petrified relationship— within your place of work, your friendships, or your marriage. And it will eventually kill you. YOU will become a petrified fungus, no longer capable of doing little more than lying there, dormant, ineffective, and, in essence, a dead weight to anyone around you.

Is this what you want to settle for in life? I sure as hell don’t.

For what it’s worth,

  Gary

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Wondering

Dr, Gary, Davis, wonder, life, love, invention                  Few of us take the time to wonder about our lives, why we’re here, or where everything around us came from. We’re too busy, moving as fast as we can for… what? We don’t take the time to sit still, gaze at the clouds, the ocean’s roiling waves, or the vastness of the night sky.

Most of us plow through one day after another, in a routine we don’t even notice over time; it’s just what we do. DO.

Maybe that’s the problem; we have become a society of worker-bees, following scheduled habits with little sensivity to WHY we do what we do. We just DO.

This has taken over our creativity, our ingenuity, our play, and replaced it with productivity. We measure a man by what and how much he can produce. Worker bees. Whether it’s on an assembly line or in a bank or in a staff meeting, we DO. So when do we get to think?

When do we get to address the why’s of our life? Satirist Mark Twain once said, “The two most important days in anyone’s life are the day they were born…, and the day they find out why.” You need to ask that question—  the WHY one. Have you done it?

INVENTION usually arrises out of a combination of playing around coupled with that Ah Ha! moment when it all comes together. But if you have no time to wonder at the clouds, to let your mind float along with them, how will you ever chance upon those moments of surprising, stunning revelation? Ah-Ha!

WONDER is the mixing-pot from which our imagination cooks up genius. It provides us with the time needed to separate ourselves from our daily repetitions and lifts our minds & spirits to leave the confinements of our bodies and soar into the realms of dreams, fantasies, and creation. If we never take time to WONDER, we will forever remain earthbound, going about our lives with little thought to what-could-have-been.

So, go sailing, take a hike, lie in a warm field of grass and get lost in the clouds or the stars at night. Give your heart to dreaming and your mind to wonder. Surprises await.

This is my challenge to you. O, wait, you don’t have time for this, do you?  Put down your cell phone.

What if…,

  Gary

Recovering from Betrayal

Gary, Davis, betrayal, recovering, recover, revenge       One of the deepest hurts that happens to any of us is that first time someone betrays us.  Not so much the actual betrayal, rather it is when we discover that we have been lied to, betrayed, deceived. It is a deep, soul-slashing hurt. It is not the kind of pain we want to experience ever again.

Then, of course, the stings of deception and lying continue throughout the entirety of our lives. It seems to be an aspect of human nature that we lie to protect ourselves, to look better, to hide the truth, and even, sometimes, to intentionally wound another person. This is the most painful bite of all— the friendly fire rained down upon us.

Recovering from such wounds is no simple matter. Some of us never recover; its pain either seethes within, becoming a poisonous infection or it lingers, waiting for the day of retribution. Still, our revenge is only temporarily satisfying. What we truly need is a full recovery from the corruption that eats away at us. Some recovery suggestions—

1.      Though forgiveness may not be the first thing on our minds, in our rage and anger, eventually we must come to a place where we forgive the other person, or group. If we do not forgive, our broiling antagonism will slowly destroy us.

2.      Processing the wound with a close friend is also advised; not a friend who will support you in your anger, rather one who will guide you to a clearer perspective. You don’t want to fan the flames; rather, you want to find a friend who will help you tame the flames to warm and calm you. Retribution burns everything in its midst: never rekindle its embers. Let it die.

3.      Time is on your side. You will grow past this. You will emerge from the dark tunnel of seething anger. But you will, you must, grow your way out.

4.      In worst-case scenarios, seeking the counsel of a psychiatrist might be needed. To this day, I know people who cannot let go of their desire to seek revenge on those who have wronged them.

5.      Not surprisingly, vigorous exercise (sports, running, chasing after small children) releases toxins while it brings body-mind balance back in line. Something to think about.

There are many more solutions to help you recover from betrayal and the inner scars it leaves behind. May these simple suggestions start you down the right road to recovery.

For what it’s worth,

  Gary

Sustainability

Sustainable, Sustainability, Gary, Davis, Clueless, Growth,             The possibility of sustainable energy is within the realm of fulfillment. Solar energy for homes, wind energies for cities and agriculture, and long life battery storage for vehicles are all now attainable. Imagine your home powered by the sun & wind, storing up enough electrical energy to power not only your house & its appliances, but also your car! You would never have to pay for fuel, or power, again. Then again, repair costs could be astronomical; but, hey, there you go… .

Let’s shift a bit. Let’s switch over to your life, your body. It is fairly obvious what it takes to maintain a sustainable body— food, exercise, rest, community, dance & music (some would add sports):  but what about a sustainable life? What does it take to keep on keeping on? Here’s my list. Please feel free to amend it, change it, or challenge it. I know there must be a more expansive list.

1.      A Sense of Well-Being— That intrinsic sense that all-is-well-with-the-world. Well, at least your world. It’s that sense of achievement that you’ve done a good job; you’ve finished that project, that you have completed a major undertaking and are now at another level in your life.

2.      A Great Expectation— No, not the book; but your own expectation. Something you’ve looked forward to all your life. Your wedding, that first child, a promotion, a new job, travel to Scotland, a championship. It brightens your morning, your day, week, and life!

3.      Passion— Something, or someone, who grabs the very depths of your spirit and draws you to join in. Name it your mission, your calling, a drive; call it what you will, it gets you out of bed in the morning and doesn’t let you go. It is that thing that motivates you to come alive and Go-for-It! I know my passion:  it sustains and excites me every day. What’s your passion? Have one? NO?!? Hummm.

4.      A Will to Live— For some of us it is simply a determination to get through another day. Life has been hard, even cruel, for us. Facing each new day is a challenge, [Note- If you are between 13-18, you have no idea what I am talking about, so, stay in bed.] Facing your week seems like an insurmountable obligation. You hate your job, you’ve had it with your living situation, your kids never give you a break. You’re more tired than most people realize. I’ve been there often. It’s not easy; but you can press through the pain, the exhaustion, the depression. Learn to fortify your soul. AND…, create breaks in each day.

5.      Set Impossibly Attainable Goals— Yes, you read that right. Impossibly attainable. If you set goals that are attainable, you will accomplish them. Try setting goals that are a tad above your reach that will stretch you and keep you on your toes. Note- Your feet don’t necessarily need to be on the floor.

6.      Enjoy Friendships— Good friends are hard to come by— and to sustain. Celebrate with them often. Sometimes I celebrate Tuesday with friends, or Thursdays. Why? Why not!?! It’s the reason God invented the weekend and parties and football; and definitely single-malt Scotch.

7.      Refuel— Go out on the town; eat quality food in a nice restaurant. Dress up! Enjoy the comradery & the conversation of friends. That is, if you’re an external processor. If you are an internal processor, curl up with a good book next to a fire, take a silent walk through the woods, escape the hubbub of the city, flee the tumult of your life. You need time to be alone and have your spirit recreated. Personally, I find refreshment in art museums & galleries; and walks through the woods.

One more thing— Having been a raving extrovert most of my life, I find it odd that I now seek solitude and renovation in prayer and meditation. Maybe others of my kind also need this kind of refreshment for their busy lives. For those more serene in life, well, you’ve got it made. (

For what it’s worth,

  Gary